You can read the first part of this story here.
To say the least, I was really dissapointed in myself, me, the responsible one, getting pregnant when we were working for the next meal- literally.
We had help a couple times to pay rent, but we couldn't get ahead. We couldn't even catch up!
About that time, the in- laws scored a tremendous deal on a house down the street from theirs. It was about to enter foreclosure, so they were basically saving their neighbors from bankruptcy. The plan was to flip it. To say it needed work is an understatement. It. Really. Needed. Work. So, work we did. And we were about to face eviction. The in- laws were so gracious to restore it and then allow us to move in and rent it. So, we helped with some of the work. Three babies later, we still are renting it.
I remember painting my baby's room- with the windows open, people! And singing this song.
I did not want to be pregnant. I did not want to become a mother. I think I was overdosing on the fear of failure.
I watched in amazement as the Lord poured on blessings, using everyone around us. My class of students were so excited and they brought in bags and bags of hand-me-downs from their baby sisters. We had two baby showers for our northern families and our southern families. Our baby's every need and then some was supplied by these people who love us. For a couple years, I was giving away baby items that we had never even used.
I saw myself as an unfit mother. I was puzzled that this God, whom I love and worship would see fit to bless me with so many things for my baby.